Tuesday, June 29, 2010

The Greatest Love Story Ever Told?

I just read something that says Twilight is the "greatest love story ever told".

Wow. Really?

Pretty strong statement. There are a lot of good love stories out there after all! So I figured I would ask - do YOU think Twilight is the "greatest love story ever told"? Or even as good as the greats.

If so, why? If not, why not?

No flames here, you can even make up a name if you want to stay anonymous (it may allow anon. comments, I don't know). Of course I have my own opinion on this! I would just like to hear from others.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Free Range Kids

I love this site.

I discovered it at least a year ago, when someone somewhere I don't remember posted a link and I realized that I had become a helicopter mom to the triplets. I had NOT been with the older kids, in fact I have to confess I used to mock the helicopters!

I decided to start by NOT walking the kids to the bus stop on the corner (one house away). My excuse reason for walking them had always been that they would be poking each other right into the street. Well, that's what I was afraid of anyway. By this time they were 7 or 8 and I decided it was time to teach them and trust them.

I did start slow - first I walked to the ditch and waited till the bus left. Then I gradually lengthened the distance between us until I was on the porch watching. Finally one day I had to help their brother with something and just hollered "goodbye, have a great day" as they went out the door. By the time I walked out the bus was gone.

It was a little bittersweet. We had fun at the bus stop. My family blog is full of cute stories of conversations we had and how we would watch the anthill and the bird nests in the magnolia tree. But actually they still notice these things and tell me about them at home.

Of course it didn't help matters that around this time there was a story of an abduction at a bus stop. Did I freak out? Yeah! But the fact is, I can't hover over them "just in case". I can't protect them from everything. I can let go without getting stupid about it.

There are many other things people do that I think are overkill and unnecessary. Booster seats till the age of 10, for one. The law here is 6, and I thought THAT was overkill!

So I'm really curious what other people think of that site and its ideas. I have friends that I'm sure would think it's totally insane. What are some ways you "let go" that other people may think are crazy? Or the opposite? I would like to hear them. No judgment on any replies. :)

Saturday, June 26, 2010

What Not to Say

MoMs (Mothers of Multiples) are all too familiar with the stupid and/or thoughtless things people say. But it's not limited to us! Stupidity is everywhere and I witnessed a LOT of it last week at Cub Scout Day Camp. Here are just a few of the things other parents had to say to me:

(When introduced as their boy's leader for the week) "Wow, I wondered who would be stupid enough to be out here with them all week!"

(When assigned as my helper for one day) "This has been the worst day of my life! I am dying!" (yeah, that's kind of similar to the mother of one infant complaining to us of the stress, heh)

And the kicker: The last day was Family Day, and parents were supposed to spend the day at camp checking out what the boys had been doing. I had several parents come ouut but NOT ONE stayed for any length of time... "This heat is brutal! I'm going home to cool off, be back later!"

Yeah...it was HOT, it was MISERABLE, but someone has to do it! We already discussed that it's not for everyone - but when the leader is standing in front of you sweating her ass off and wanting to go to the bathroom but there is no one to stay with the group because the other parents are a bunch of weenie-ass WUSSES, it's probably best to keep your mouth shut!

I am laughing as I type this so don't think I'm angry. It just goes to show that stupid comments are everywhere!

Thursday, June 24, 2010

The Things we Do for our Kids.

I've been thinking a lot about this lately as I find myself doing more and more stuff I may not particularly like, "for the kids". I've been working at Cub Scout day camp all week; a few weeks ago it was Girl Scout day camp. Moms like me (you know, the ones with "SUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" written across our foreheads in big, red letters) must be a dying breed, since both camps were desperate for volunteers (much less Queens of the Suckers like me who were willing to work ALL WEEK).

Don't get me wrong, I don't HATE doing these things. I really do pretty much like them. But I won't miss them when the kids grow out of the activity.

Last night as I told Hubby about my day he asked me WHY I do this if I hate it so much? I will admit, there was some bitching going on, but I didn't think it was all bad. Anyway, the answer was "for the kids". He thought the kids could still do day camp even if I didn't. I pointed out that they are begging for helpers to begin with and that all the other parents have wussed out and make excuses. Wimps! Yeah, let me tell you how I really feel, LOL!

Someone DOES have to do it, and I've learned to say no to a lot of stuff. I don't teach Sunday School, or work in the nursery, or direct VBS, or head up the neighborhood whatever campaign, or serve on the PTA, or serve lunch to the homeless. I am not the room mom. I am not the team mom. I am not the head of the class reunion committee. I do not make ANY phone calls whatsoever, or coach Little League. I don't watch other people's kids, except in extreme emergency. I am not the one to call if you need a substitute in your classroom. Frankly I am not the person to call if you need anything. I will almost always tell you no.

Put out a general cattle call though, letting everyone know what you need, and having the option to call YOU is how it happens with me.

I do go on field trips, and I drive the instruments on band trips, and I do Scouts. I do Scouts because I believe in Scouts, and because someone has to do it. So I am the Brownie leader basically because I HAD to be. But I can say no, too; when they tried to triple the size of my troop last week I put my foot down and told them that it's time for some OTHER Mom to step up and lead so their daughter can have a troop. I did it, so can you. My troop is full, and registration is closed, thank you/drive thru!

Whatever. The fact is I do enjoy Scouts. I have almost no patience for other people's kids, but I do take endless pleasure in my own. So as long as they are into it I will do it for them (reserving the right to bitch about it to my husband if I so choose!).

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Ban Hammer

I must have missed a bunch of good stuff over at Triplet Connection lately, because when I went back (I try to go visit every few weeks or so) it seemed all hell had broken loose. Quite a few (not sure how many) long time members have been banned. Not only that - their posts have been completely erased, as if they never existed!

I am / have been admin at several sites over the past few years. I am not at all familiar with the format of the Triplet Connection forum (DC forum). I can tell you all sorts of good stuff about vBulletin, phpNuke and phpBB (OK, I admit, some bad stuff too!).

For instance, I can tell you that when someone on one of those boards gets banned their posts are NOT automatically deleted. If the person is banned, the name of the member remains (thus can not be re-used). The name remains on the posts and the posts remain exactly as posted, unless they are individually deleted/edited. I can tell you that the member no longer has a profile that can be seen by the average member, but that the admin staff can still access the profile if they so choose. Often a new user title appears under the name, such as "guest", "banned", or "bad kid" (I am not making that up!). The admin gets to choose which title goes under each name; it is not set in stone.

I can also tell you that banning is not permanent, even if they tell you that it is. If a member is simply banned, all it takes to reinstate them is a simple click of a box in the admin panel. vBulletin even allows you to set a time, as in a suspension. Or to set that member to b automatically sent for moderation when they post.

If a board admin wanted to go a step further they could delete the member. Of the several forums I have worked for this is never the preferred method, because someone can come back the same day and open a new account under that same name. To avoid that requires another step of putting the name on the blocked list, which really serves no useful purpose since the member can come back with a similar name with no undue stress to themselves.

Now, the question is, what if I do delete a member? What happens to their posts then? The answer is they remain on the site, under the title "guest" or whatever other name the staff chooses. There they are, providing the necessary flow of conversation, the advice that may still be wanted even though the actual member went over to the dark side.

In order to have every single one of the members' posts go *poof*, they have to be manually *poofed*. In the forums I am familiar with, they must be poofed one at a time. Which can be a major pain in the butt if we're talking about thousands of posts. Of course there may be an option to poof them all at once, but if there is I don't know about it. At any rate it's not a requirement, it's a choice.

So.....just saying. Someone must really have wanted every trace of someone else removed pretty badly.