Saturday, January 22, 2011

Party Invitations

Today one of the boys went to party for one of the boys in his class. It was one of those things where everyone in the class gets an invitation. It was not addressed to anyone. When this happens, as soon as they give them to me I write the guest's name on it so I can remember who is invited! LOL!

Every once in awhile the kid will tell me the others are invited too. I always tell them, I need to hear that from the Mom, and I will not call to ask (because I don't want to put them on the spot and feel obligated).

So of course we get to this party and the Mom says, oh, where are the others? UMM!! I called you to RSVP, I told you Triplet A will be there, if you wanted B and C there that was your cue! So I gave her a blank stare and said "theyr'e at home" and she says "oh you could have brought them". So they are sitting at home 30 miles away while their brother is playing laser tag.

I have taught them since Kindergarten, when they went to separate classrooms, to accept that they will be invited to different places and to be happy for each other. And they are! There were no tears about this party, but certainly a wistful regret. I have taught them well.

And I do not want parents thinking they are a package deal. This little vent is not about that. Just, if it's OK and expected that I bring all of them, you need to TELL me. I would be happy to! IF I know they are invited!

Damn, it's so hard being a decent guest these days.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011


I just read what is very likely one of THE most disturbing articles I have ever seen. This link will give the basics and has a link to the actual article on Huffington Post.

Susan G. Komen Foundation should be ashamed of themselves!! I seriously hope there is such a thing as karma because I really want it to turn around and bite them in the ass. Speaking of boobs! Indeed!!

I am proud to say I have never given one red cent to Komen other than the odd product I may have been purchasing anyway that had a pink ribbon on it. My reason for not giving was mostly that after watching my parents die from cancer, I have absolutely no confidence in "acceptable" treatment methods over alternative. When they died, we asked for donations to alternative research and Hospice, not to any traditional cancer places (which is what they would have wanted). It's not that I am against standard treatment, and God forbid should I ever have to make the choice I don't know what I would choose. But I have seen enough that I have consciously not given any donations.

From now on, if a product I was planning to buy anyway happens to have a pink ribbon on it, I will make the fully CONSCIOUS decision to NOT buy it. I will also make the conscious effort to get the word out so that others can make informed choices!

I have also been leery of ALL the pink and the products and such. Why breast cancer over all other kinds? I don't know why I was leery, but I just was. And there is NO shortage of breast cancer in my family. It is definitely in my best interests to find a cure. And yet I was leery and consciously NOT donating.

Now I am SO glad I didn't. Why would anyone continue to donate money to them now? If I give to them my donation will go towards threatening another legitimate case and also take money from them! If I give to one of the small charities my money will apparently need to go for either defending the lawsuit, or them having to buy all new stuff in order to comply! This is one of the most despicable things I have ever seen!

SHAME ON YOU Susan G Komen Foundation!!

Edited to add:

This is a link to a site called "Charity Navigator". Please click the link on that page to read the comments, which go back farther than the HuffPost article.

Here is a link to SGK's Wikipedia page that dates these events as far back as August, 2010. There is no link to the WSJ article so I will look for that.

In the interest of fairness, here is a "response" from the SGK Facebook page:

Personally, in light of what else I've read I find this to be very insulting.

Also, this is a post made on the SGK Facebook page that I would like to share. I edited out the woman's name.

Post #1
My name is (edited), and I participated in the Breast Cancer 3 Day, in Seattle WA, September, 2009. It was a great experience and I met some wonderful people. The volunteers at the event were first rate. It was a grueling task, which affected my body for months afterward i.e., aches and pains, blisters, plantar fascitis, but I thought it was for a good cause, so I rarely complained, figuring it was a small sacrifice for a good deed.

Imagine my shock (when I was watching The Colbert Report of all shows), to discover that approximately one million dollars a year, of donor dollars, goes to suing various Mom and Pop charities in order to retain some morbid ideal of owning the phrase 'for a cure' or 'for the cure.' Shame on you. I've read your canned response, which implies that people are too stupid to know what charity they are donating to. I've donated to a lot of charities, some with the words 'for the cure,' knowing that I was not donating to Susan Komen. Believe it or not, SKFTC is not the only charity people want to donate to. You have insulted and embarassed not only donors, but people like me, who have raised dollars for your cause. Never again will I participate in your events or donate to
your foundation, and I would imagine that I'm not alone. Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face.

My daughter's grandmother and my good friend is fighting terminal breast cancer, and I walked the 3 day in her honor. This is what infuriates me the most. The blood, sweat, and tears, pushing myself so hard as an ode to a very brave lady, who was so proud of me for doing this in her honor. If she finds out about this, it is going to take away some of the 'shine' from her experience. To add insult to injury, she and her husband donated $50 to your foundation, when I walked the 3 Day. How does that make you feel? Taking money from a hardworking farm wife with terminal breast cancer, when 17% of that $50 goes to cover your administrative costs and so that you can bully defenseless charities? (I've come across that 17% figure as I've looked into this law suit issue) Unbelievable.

In closing, I raised the required $2,300 from friends, family, neighbors, and businesses, 100% of that went to Komen. I am a single mom, a registered nurse from Montana, and I could barely afford to make the trip to Seattle. My donors, as well as millions of other donors, are fighting this recession along with everyone else. To spend even one red cent of their hard earned dollars on lawsuits is a travesty. I feel like apologizing to every one of my donors for your terrible ethics. I think that the only way to save your face is to apologize to the public and small charities, and put a stop to the lawsuits, and while you're at it, spend a little less on salaried employees and spend a little more on breast cancer research. I know that you have done a lot of good in the fight against breast cancer, but this time, you have completely crossed the line. Perhaps the phrase 'all good things must come to an end' applies here.


Post #2
Sorry for the long post, but this is what I emailed to Komen, and I hope some people take the time to read it here. Please continue to donate to breast cancer causes, but really look at where the money is can donate to research directly or donate to local causes, too. Thank you.

Post #3
Actually, I screwed up in my earlier post...I've read that only 17% goes to breast cancer research, while the other 83% goes to administrative costs. If this information is wrong, I hope SGKFTC corrects me.