The Thing About Plastic

Have you been keeping up with the latest about plastic?

I don't watch the news, I don't often read the paper. I get most of my news when something jumps out at me from my Google Homepage, or if I read about it on one of my forums. One parenting forum has been all a-buzz lately with talk about plastic.

More specifically, it's BPA that is causing a stir. BPA is bisphenol-a, a chemical used in some types of plastic. Apparently it leaches into food and liquids (especially hot stuff) and can cause all sorts of health problems, including hormonal and developmental issues, tumor growth and cancer.

I usually pay no attention to the health hype of the week, simply because the way it normally goes is that by next week it won't be as bad as it sounded and there will be something else gonna make us all die. Plus, plastic is everywhere. Is it really realistic to stop using it? Heck, it's in our mouths; two of my kids got dental sealants last week and will be getting it in their fillings next. Hmm, which of the three dental options to go for...mercury, plastic or rotten teeth? I can stop buying canned soup (BPA is widely used in the liners of food cans) and make my own. I can store it in those Ziploc containers...nope. Baggies? No....Tupperware? They refuse to comment, so who knows...So yeah, homemade soup is initially healthier for us but ultimately it all goes into the plastic somehow. I can't afford to buy everything in glass containers. I can't afford to buy everything fresh, although I do buy lots fresh, and bring it home to store in....plastic.

I hope you get my point. It is simply not realistic for me to completely be rid of this, even if I try as hard as I can. I'm guessing it's the same for most families. And will getting rid of a little make any difference at all? Well, the jury is out on that.

But one of the effects of this is cancer and tumor growth. My Dad already has cancer, as we found out last month, so I did tell him about this so he can make informed choices. He is opting for alternative treatment for now, so he's eating everything fresh. But storing it in plastic, of course. No-win situation.

Apparently some of the biggest risk is to young and unborn babies. Pregnant moms - please keep an eye on your plastic use. Bottle feeding moms - it's in most plastic bottles, so you may want to switch. Wal-Mart has already pulled bottles off their shelves, unless stated to be BPA free. Some ARE BPA free already, so do check! AND it is still in the liners of the formula cans. Powder is best. Canada is about to declare BPA as toxic and ban its use in baby bottles (although baby bottles seem to be the only item it will be banned in for now).

Guide to Baby-Safe Bottles & Formula

I will take this moment to get up on my soapbox and suggest breastfeeding! I nursed all my babies, including the triplets who never had a single drop of formula.

Also, check your plastic sippy cups, plates, cutlery.

NOT ALL PLASTICS CONTAIN BPA!!!
Most plastic items have a number, usually found on the bottom of an item, inside a little triangle like this:

The numbers are one through seven. The "bad" numbers - the BPA plastics - are 3, 6, and 7. Here is a list:

Which Plastics Are Safe?


Here are some links..I still can't find a whole lot, but these seem to be informative:

FDA reviewing plastic ingredient BPA

Study of Chemical in Plastic Bottles Raises Alarm

Canada likely to label plastic ingredient BPA 'toxic'

Toxic designation would not force bisphenol A off shelves

Cigarettes, asbestos, lead paint...among others were all once in common use until the dangers were really known. This won't be the last. As one mom on the parenting board said, parents used to load up their newborn infant in the car at the hospital, with no car seat, and drive home with the windows up and cigarettes lit. To put to bed in the crib painted with lead paint. Never knowing how dangerous it was. At least now, the parents who still do things like that have no excuse to say they "didn't know". It's all about information to make our choices. I don't know yet what to do about plastic. I have a fortune tied up in Tupperware. But I can use the information here to at least choose not to freeze or heat foods in dangerous plastics. I can choose to replace water bottles with safer ones. I can't eliminate it, but I can lessen it if I choose. I sought out this info to help me make choices for my family. I am posting it in case it may help someone else to do the same.

Customer Service Review - Quiznos

I'm a stickler for customer service. 'What's that?' You young whippersnapppers may ask - and with good reason! It's very hard to find these days. Ask your parents, and they may just remember it themselves, but maybe not. It was in style long ago...once upon a time...so many years ago that it does seem like a fairy tale. It involved companies actually trying to please their customers, and stuff like that. But I digress; on to the story.

It was a warm spring day. A and I headed into Quiznos for lunch after a morning at the dentist. He had seen the commercials and was in the mood for something "mmmmmmmToasty" for a change. So in we went. We are not frequent Quiznos customers, so we took longer than most at the menu board. Finally, our choices were made. He got the Italian Sub; I ordered the Baja Chicken with Bacon. It was a tough choice; a tossup between that and the Mesquite Chicken with Bacon. See, I love chicken, and I love bacon. But I really, really love cilantro -- so I chose the Baja.

At the other end of the toaster the clerk added the extra toppings. "I would really love some extra cilantro, please" I requested. The clerk gave me a funny look - "Oh, we don't have cilantro!" Interpreting this as meaning they were simply out - after all, the word cilantro and the little green leaves were very much in evidence in the pictures - I expressed my disappointment. The manager stepped forward as if irate at our discussion. "We're not OUT. We don't keep it here. It isn't practical for me to carry cilantro. Do you know how long it keeps? And that's the only sandwich that calls for it. Hardly anyone orders that sandwich. Why should I order it?"

"Well, because it's on the menu, and the menu says cilantro; maybe you should put a little note on the menu that you don't have any cilantro so that people know before they order?" I suggested.

"You are the first person to ever complain" he said.

"I don't see how that makes any difference...if it says there will be cilantro, there ought to be cilantro" I replied.

Long silence.

Deep sigh.

"Lady, if you want another sandwich, I will make you one. But we just don't have any cilantro!"

I didn't ask for another sandwich. It wasn't about the cilantro, anyway. It was about the fact that cilantro was specifically mentioned as an ingredient and he had simply decided that he would not only not make any effort whatsoever to provide the advertised product, but that he would also insult the intelligence of any customer who actually had the audacity to want the product as advertised.

I wonder what kind of leeway independent Quiznos owners have to alter the menu? But it's not about that, either. I am not demanding that he keep cilantro on hand. It makes absolutely no difference to me one way or another. What I DO have a problem with is that it is advertised as such. A small handwritten note on each picture / description in the store "Sorry, no cilantro" would completely satisfy me. False advertising is a little pet peeve of mine.

Since most people don't even seem to know what cilantro is, they probably don't know anything about the cost or shelf life either. I do buy it frequently. It's true that I can't personally use up a bunch of cilantro before it rots and I have to throw the rest out. It comes in a bunch like parsley, and costs about 75 cents a bunch in my store. It lasts in the fridge for about a week in the bag you got at the store. If I use it every day I still can't use it up before it rots.

So, let's figure this out, shall we? If hardly anyone ever orders the Baja Chicken, that means that they can buy one bunch of cilantro per week and not use it all up, it would be plenty for the needs of the week. At the end of the week they have spent 75 cents and throw the rest away. Maybe they didn't sell a single Baja - who knows. Who cares? It seems to me that 75 cents a week is a pittance to be sure that the customers who do want the Baja are happy. If the management disagrees, why not just take it off the menu altogether? The point is it will not bring them anywhere close to financial ruin to just get the cilantro! Nor would it to add a note to the menu. False advertising!

I don't exactly do boycotts, but I certainly do choose where to spend my money and time. I don't care for Quiznos for several reasons. They are too expensive for my budget, for food and atmosphere (I could go to Olive Garden for what I spent on that lunch). Their food isn't that great IMO (good, but not great). If I'm looking for a sandwich I much prefer Subway, and even without the current $5 footlong it's a better price. So I won't be back to Quiznos unless I am with someone who is either buying or insists on eating there.

Imagine, this entry could have been avoided if they had simply put a note on the sign - or just told me they were out of cilantro. How hard is it to just sell what you advertise? How hard is it to just advertise only what you will sell?

A had a good question as we ate. "What if they decided they didn't want to buy any more ham? Would it be OK to just leave it off the sandwich and not say anything, and then treat the customers like idiots for asking?" Yeah, I know it's an extreme example....or is it?

Big Girl

I'm so proud of my Big Girl.

As we all know, one of the problems with having triplets in separate classes is spreading yourself around as a parent volunteer. Not the least of these occasions is the dreaded Field Trip.

At our school, each class is allowed to have four parents accompany them. We're not a school that has a shortage of willing parents, so there is a lottery system. You let them know you're interested by the deadline, and they put all the names in a hat and choose four. If you get picked for one, you're not in the lottery for the next, unless there's a shortage (which is rare!).

I discussed this with one teacher early in the year, and it was decided that I would put my name in for all three classes each time, and if I get picked for more than one, we would go from there. That didn't happen, though, and I went with Mrs. H's class the first time.

So this time (there are only two field trips this year) I put my name in for Mrs. L's and Mrs. M's. I was chosen by Mrs. M.

OK, that's the background. Yesterday Girlie brought home a note from Mrs. M:

"I just discovered that Hrs. H only has one volunteer signed up, while Mrs. L and I had to turn some away. Would you be willing to go with Mrs. H's class instead? It's totally up to you, but please let me know ASAP so that we know how to proceed."

Girlie knew the situation already, so I asked her what she thought I should do. She immediately said "Mrs. H needs you, so you should go with them."

"Are you sure? You know that means I won't be with you" I replied. I asked her this twice, and she said yes, like it was no problem. So I started to write the note back to Mrs. M.

A few minutes later she stood in front of me, lower lip quivering. As tears welled up in her eyes, she said bravely "Maybe you can go on a field trip with me next year".

AWWWWWWW!!!!!

Well, I knew something had to be done. I thought for a minute, and then presented a couple of possibilities I thought of. The best one, in my opinion was for me to go with Mrs. H's class, but have Girlie get to go with my group. This would require permission from the principal, and would also mean that Girlie would miss out on one of the cool aspects of being a chaperone's kid - choosing her bestest friends to be in her group. But she agreed that it was a good compromise (How long, I wonder, will Mommy win out over bestest friends? I dunno, but I'll take it. ).

I'm so proud of Girlie, first for being willing to help where help was needed. When she came to me with tears, she was not trying to take back her decision - just letting me know how she felt. So I'm very proud of her for that. I'm not sure *I* could be big enough to do that! And finally I am really proud of her for being willing and able to compromise. She didn't have to, you know. The teacher left it totally up to me. I would have gone with her decision if she wanted me to go with her class. It's the teacher's problem to get chaperones, and there were other solutions (like dividing up Mrs. H's students among other classes). I would not have thought any less of her for saying she wanted to keep things as originally planned. But it's her nature to be helpful, so I am not surprised she chose as she did.

The story ends well...we got permission from all parties to transfer Girlie for the day. Girlie is thrilled! M is thrilled, because I get to go with him after all. He gets both field trips this year, but has not rubbed that in at all, and S doesn't seem to mind. I had prepared them for the certainty of "unfairness" at the beginning of the year, and they have done a great job of being happy for each other instead of feeling sorry for themselves if they don't get the same thing. So I'm really proud of all of them.

More on Customer Service - Nintendo

I'm the first one to complain about bad customer service, the death of customer service, etc. I have another experience I'd like to share.

My boys went rushing out yesterday with their saved up cash and gift cards, to buy Super Smash Brothers, and some extra Wii-motes and accessories for their Wii. They had planned to spend the rest of the day playing their new game. They were so excited!

But when they got home, the game wouldn't play! An error message kept popping up. Sometimes the game would come up, then crash. They did try other games and found that it happened with all of them. I got kicked off my computer so they could look it up. "Call for Service" it said. Ahhhhh.....not good news. There was no joy in my house.

The Big Kid made the call. I would have offered to, probably insisted, but he did it before I knew it. He waited semi-patiently through all the automated stuff (he had it on speaker. You would not believe how many times they warn you that this phone call may be monitored or recorded! )

Finally, Jay came on the line and listened to the tale. You probably won't be surprised, being familiar with the way our luck runs, to find that our unit is out of warranty - by TWO WEEKS. Now, what does that usually mean? You're on your own, bucko. Pleasure doing business with you. *shrug*

Jay cheerfully informed my son that although the unit was out of warranty they would honor it anyway. THEN he said they would extend it for another year! "How much does that cost?" asked The Big Kid. "Your only cost will be any packing materials you need", said Jay. "You have a printer? Hang on, I'll e-mail you a prepaid FedEx label." WHA!!

So, while they still didn't get to play (Big Kid did. He went to a friend's house, and came home more dejected than ever for not having it here.) they are very happy. MEGA Kudos to Nintendo for their customer service (I'll report again when it's all said and done in 11-16 days ). They made my boys very happy. And the Mommy too, of course, from whose pocket would have been rendered the cost, I'm sure!

Update: the Wii was returned via FedEx in exactly 11 days! WOW!!!

Library Fine

The note read, "Behavior Contract for 8th Grade Picnic". No one will be allowed to go if they have any suspensions, excessive tardies, etc. Oh, and unpaid fines.... including library fines.

So when Second brought me that note we knew we were being pushed to action. No more standing on principle alone. Isn't there some old saying that goes something like "He who stands on principle stays at school with the principal (during the 8th Grade Picnic)"?

Here's the story. Last year - yes, that would be 7th Grade - he took out a library book. Unfortunately, he lost it. He came to me about it, and I told him he would have to pay with his own money. I mean, what better time to learn, right? So he can be more careful the next time?

But he found the book, after all, before he paid $12.50 for it. The librarian told him the fine was $4.50. He had come prepared with a $5 bill for the maximum fine. $4.50 was a pleasant surprise - now he could get a snack from the machine, too!

Incident over, done with, and forgotten. At least until last fall. The note from the library stated that he had never paid the fine.

He spoke to the assistant librarian - the one he says he paid - about it. I had him point out that he would not have gotten his report card if he hadn't paid, because that's how they do things. But the Asst. librarian told him they are not allowed to withhold report cards anymore, which was news to me.

Every month a note is sent to his homeroom teacher, diligently reminding him of this fine. She asked him about it the first month, and he explained himself. She discussed it with me during a field trip, too. She believes his story, BTW. He is not a liar, and he is not one to make up an elaborate story. She said she would discuss it with the librarian. I told her that I had advised him not to pay a fine he had already paid, that since they don't give out receipts it is their word against his and they should figure it out. Incident forgotten, again.

Until the note, this morning. This is getting desperate, people. I don't want him to miss his picnic, principle or no principle. So I went to speak to the librarian myself.

This was the first I had heard of there being an assistant involved. The main librarian didn't know anything about it. The assistant came running from the other end of the room when she heard us talking. "He did NOT pay that fine!" She seemed overly defensive to me. She also denied that the Kid had ever discussed it with her, or that the teacher had. So we first had to explain to the Head Librarian why we were just now coming in to talk about it after all these months. Please understand that I am not accusing her of anything other than not recording his payment (well, saying no one had mentioned it to her...but I suppose she could have forgotten? Though she WAS very quick to defend herself.). The head librarian assured me that the Asst. is very competent. I am not questioning that in the least. I don't know her. She may indeed be the most reliable person in the world the rest of the time. People make mistakes, of course. I admit I am tired of paying for the mistakes of others, but I suppose it all evens out somewhere along the line. Right?

But I absolutely do NOT buy it when someone says things like, "we are very thorough about this", "we've never had a complaint before", or the biggie "we don't make mistakes". Because everyone makes mistakes. Anyone who says they don't, IS a liar. I don't care if I AM the first one to complain, that means nothing. I don't care how thorough you are, or what measures you have in place to prevent mistakes. Ask my bank, who just credited me $500 of an ATM deposit THEY had misplaced and assured me that it couldn't possibly be a mistake on THEIR end. Of course the flip side of that is I have to be willing to accept and admit that the mistake could be on my end. Or even on my Kid's end. I am always willing to do that, even when I know beyond a doubt that it's not. But you know what I hate worse than all that? I hate when the person cops an attitude about it. Like this lady did. I really, really hate that, and I will fight that much harder on principle when that happens, 100% of the time.

Bottom line - they take in cash payments. They don't give receipts. It's my word against theirs. Does anyone have any doubts as to who will win this one?

I stayed calm throughout the discussion (not common for me especially with the attitude component). I thanked them for their time, and assured them I would see that it was taken care of.

On the way out, I stopped by the Assistant Principal's office and asked for a moment of her time. I calmly explained my story. I made it clear that the issue is NOT the money itself, and that I do not want my son to miss the picnic. She knows my son, knows he is a good kid, not a troublemaker. All that is beside the point, of course, I know he is no perfect angel, and I admitted that. I do happen to believe his story, and his homeroom teacher does. But without a receipt.....

What do I want out of this? I think what I want is for the library to admit that it's possible they made a mistake. EVEN IF I have to end up paying the fine. I will be happy to pay it, if it comes to that. Well, not happy, but I'll do it. . I will not ask my son to pay it. I want the library to admit it could have happened and I want them to purchase a receipt book to use for cash transactions. It's crazy that they didn't already have that in place.

Edit: Just had the call back from the school. The library is still denying any mistakes... But, they WILL start issuing receipts from now on. And we agreed that I will pay half the fine. They first offered to let him work it off in the library, but I flatly declined. As far as I am concerned, he paid the fine last year. He doesn't need to be working it off again!

"The librarian says he avoids the library", she said...as if to imply a guilty conscience?! NO, I replied. Why should he go in the library if he knows he can't check out a book? He's been walking to the public library every week all year. But he laughed when I told him this. "I go to the library with my class every week!" he says. Just doesn't check out a book, of course. He's even gone in there to do research! But they would remember that, and they don't make mistakes. Hmmmph.

So, I suppose I should have taken care of this a long time ago. Frankly, I assumed he had done so, since he hadn't mentioned it again. Sigh.

Lost and Found!

Lost: One tooth.



Last seen in school cafeteria. Blame duly assigned to orange wedges. Or maybe the Broccoli Spears with Ranch.

If found, please place in plastic baggie for proper disposal under pillow. Tooth Fairy: pay attention! I hope you're reading this!



******************

I would like to thank the Kindergarten teachers for assigning me to C's class for Center Time on today of all days. I thank Verizon for producing a camera phone that takes decent pictures, and most of all I would like to thank the Big Kid who informed me last night that the phone was beeping and would maybe like to be charged up.

I would also like to thank A and B for being just as excited as we were instead of being jealous that THEY were not the first triplet to lose a tooth. Thanks to Mrs. H who got one of her baggies when Mrs. M was nowhere to be found after lunch. Super-Special Advance Thanks to the Tooth Fairy whom I hope with all my might will NOT NOT NOT forget to visit our house tonight! (Reminders welcomed )

Handicapped????

I'm a pretty easygoing person. If there's one thing I can't stand it's "Mommy Wars" and drama. But every once in awhile a thread at Triplet Connection comes along that I just can't resist! I can't say what I'm really thinking over there; I have to go easy. So here I am.

Bit of background: there is an ongoing argument (not to be confused with all the other ongoing arguments!) in MommyLand over whether a Triplet Mommy "needs" a handicapped sticker for her car. It sounds great, doesn't it? We have these big honkin' strollers to get out of the car, multiple babies to load in. It's hard, in a crowded parking lot. It's dangerous. No one's arguing those points! It's a fact!

But we all have to learn to deal with it. Hell, it's hard and dangerous even with one baby. Frankly, I had more "close calls" with my first than I ever did with the triplets. Maybe I was more cautious with them because of the added danger factor? Or maybe I was just inexperienced the first time. Who knows!?

Some parents don't want to deal with it. They want special privileges, special treatment, just because they have multiple babies. Some feel they need it; others merely feel entitled to it. Either way - it's appalling!

Here is the OP on TC, followed by just a few of the replies:

"For those of you who have handicapped hangtags, who signed the form for you - your Dr or your Pedi.?If there is a list of reasons for the hangtag, what did you select? In my state, a police officer can also sign for it, but when I went to the police station, they said that they won't sign it (they don't sign them for anyone).Please - no judgements - I didn't think I would need one until a few recent close calls in shopping center parking lots. I live in an urban area and I'm having trouble loading/unload the kids into their stroller and I believe the people can't see the stroller when backing up and a few cars have come VERY close to backing into the stroller! If I can get a hangtag, then I'll have enough room to put the stroller between the cars and load the kids. "

A few of the replies:

You don't need one, nor should you have one. Park further out and walk.There are people who truly need those spots and have difficulty getting out and about.

******

My father has a disability and needs those spaces. Don't park in them. Having triplets is not a disability. Unless you have a disabled child you do not need a handicapped tag. Please don't abuse the system.

******

You can find ways to make parking lots safer.
gotta say my kids are 6 years old and we have had many years of experience in parking lots. Do they make me nervous...yes-still to this day and my kids are no longer in a stroller. Did I ever think of getting a handicap card because of it....no. I have chosen to park further away driving around parking lots until a safe spot opened up if I had to. Wait till you have to walk with all three holding hands. The danger is still there of someone backing into you. You learn to be extra cautious and find safer parking spots. Save the handicap cards for the handicap they need them more than you.

******

Then the OP responded defensively that she hadn't been clear in her first post, that she hadn't explained her entire situation, blah blah and how dare you judge ME! I responded to this with:

It actually DOES seem pretty clear to me. DO you have a reason, or not? If so, why are you asking total strangers which reason THEY selected? You
specifically state that you want one because of "close calls", and you have been offered tips on how to deal with those. Look, when you post on a public board, you're going to get differing opinions, some of which may include judgments, even (perhaps especially!) when you ask to not have them (that's sort of a sign that you KNOW it's a controversial subject!). That's just the way it is. If you have a reason for the tag -- that's between you, your doctor and your state - not anyone else.

To some of you who seem to think it's ok beause lots of people have them that don't need them -

#1, how do you KNOW they don't need them? They may be like my friend, who is 35 and looks completely healthy but has a severe heart problem...and gets yelled at every time she uses hers, so she sometimes chooses to put her health at risk and walk, rather than get comments like "Glad to see your handicap is not
physical!". You can't always see someone's problem.

#2 - how on earth would it make it right just because "everyone else is doing it"? Wait till your kids come at you with that line.

The fact is, having multiples is NOT a handicap, even if it is inconvenient at times. We all have to learn to deal with it. It's called life.

I can't really add too much to what I wrote there. For one thing, it absolutely amazes me that so many people go to TC and ask complete STRANGERS for advice they should be getting from professionals! Medical advice, for instance. What the hell? Why are you on a message board posting about whether or not this is premature labor, instead of getting your ass to the ER pronto?? No wonder everyone is always so suspicious! Is that REALLY something a real mom would do??

But I digress. The point is, if the woman had an actual, real reason for a handicapped tag, then first of all she would have gotten one rather than post on TC asking for adice. Secondly, her first post made it clear that she does NOT have a reason. She simply wants parking lot life to be less stressful on herself. At least call it what everyone knows it is!

I really do have a 35 year old friend who looks healthy. She is trim and beautiful and looks perfectly fit, but is not. The fact is she can not walk more than a few feet without panting. She did not ask for a handicapped tag but was given one by her doctor who insists she use it for her own good. Truly, she knows it's best. But the fact is she rarely uses it. I can't tell you how many times I myself have witnessed the insults she recieves when getting out of her car. People - you can't always judge people's health by their looks! Admittedly, I used to do the same thing. Only when I saw it for myself with my friend did I realize what an asshole that made me.

So when I see comments like this it really, really pisses me off:

"There are a LOT of people out there that have one and they in no way need one!!! Us MoM's (or just mom's with several young children period) need one more
than most people that have one. JMO."

Oh, really?? Are you their doctor...NO? Then shut up! How dare you! Your statement is an insult to any parent who has ever successfuly parked their car and gone into the store without losing a kid. Get over yourself! The world does not owe you an easy time!

I understand wanting life to be easier. Having triplets is HARD, no doubt about it. But it's life. There's a difference between making things easier in appropriate ways and having a sense of entitlement. There's a difference between accepting help or even humbly asking for it, and demanding it. There's a difference between accepting free gifts offered by companies, or even asking nicely for a discount, and demanding it. There's a difference between having a medical reason for a handicap tag and demanding one just because you don't want to take the extra time to do things differently.

And be THANKFUL that you don't have a REAL handicap!!

Edited to add: a friend had an interesting comment about this subject. The same people who think they "deserve" the handicap sticker are the same ones who will gripe when a mom with one kid is using the multi-kid cart at Wal-Mart! Yeah, I think she's probably right...